Of Cell Phones, Dating and Marrying

Posted by on Jun 1, 2012 in Uncategorized | 0 comments

Of Cell Phones, Dating and Marrying

Getting that New Cell Phone

Dear Engaged Couple—Recently I have had problems with my cell phone.  Now, just to set the stage let me tell you that I depend on my cell phone for EVERYTHING.  I do not have a Garmin—I use my cell phone’s GPS for getting me where I need to go,  and I depend on that GPS A LOT.  Remember, I am a wedding officiant.  I go to lots and lots of unfamiliar wedding spots–wineries, gardens, breweries, Skyline Drive—little country inns.   

Also, I do not have a landline—again, I use my cell phone. I don’t even own an alarm clock.  You got it—I use my cell phone.  So, when it died three weeks before my two year contract expired, I was in a panic.  WHAT!!!! How can I LIVE without a cell phone for THREE WEEKS?  However, I did not want to purchase a new phone, when I had one coming to me “free” so soon.  Frugal Fannie or Cheap Charlie that I am, I decided to save my money and do without.    I tell you, it was like camping in the wilderness without so much as a book of matches or even two sticks and a piece of flint.

 Not being able to receive or make phone calls really cramped my style.   I was afraid it might do serious damage to my family relations and my business (Wedding Preacher for Hire).   Then , too, I had to depend on my natural internal rhythm to wake myself up in the mornings.  Not so good.  I reverted to printing off on my computer directions to various wedding sites—which worked pretty well, except that I went through quite a lot of paper.  By day three I had had enough.  I went to my phone store and begged and pleaded for help.  The nice man at the counter gave me a temporary phone.  Sweet.  No GPS, no e-mail access, but a phone, at least.  Two and a half weeks later, I was back at the store ready to make my purchase and sign another two-year contract, which I did..  The new phone worked for about two days.  Then the thing shut down.  I mean, it just shut down. It wasn’t like the battery was low.  It just shut down.   Back to the store where a kind gentleman showed me what to do to get it started again (just take the battery out, wait a few minutes, put it back in again and it will reboot—do this once a day—like that’s the way this particular model of phone is supposed to work). A few days later, I was back again.  This time, because while my phone was rebooting, it just froze—AUGH!!  The thing was junk, I tell you!

So, I went to another phone store, but by this time I had begun to lose confidence in all phones and all phone stores.  What if I got yet another lemon?  Could I actually stand to go through this entire process again? What phone store could I actually trust if I couldn’t trust the one with which I had been doing business these past six years?  

I am telling you this, because as much of a hassle as all of this has been, it doesn’t hold a candle to what a broken marriage can do to your life.  I mean, you leave your “defective” model of a spouse, but who’s to say the new model isn’t equally defective?  In fact, it just maybe that ALL models are defective.  Thinking thoughts like that can  really mess with your brain.  But, might it be, that none of the models are defective?  The models are all fine; Your misshaps have been due to the simple fact that you don’t know the proper care and use of  a cell phone.  Here, please picture Munch’s painting “The Scream.” >>>>>>>>>>

Yes, dating, breaking up, marrying, divorcing, getting back into the dating scene–It’s just like buying and replacing a cell phone.  Hope you have better luck than me!  Continued blessings as you plan for your big day.  The Wedding Preacher

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *